I haven't had a lot of time lately, but I ran the math on my plan to solve global warming by planting trees, using Wolfram Alpha, which has access to significantly more figures than I do. I'm not encouraged.
Taking the most extreme position possible, suppose we covered the entire land surface of the earth with Pawlonia Tormentosa, a fast growing, carbon sucking tree. These trees are planted every 25 feet across every part of the earth not covered in water. Homes, businesses, farms, freeways, and anything else we want to do on the earth is buried beneath. This works out to 1.12 trillion trees.
Each tree sucks, over the course of about 7 years, about 3*106 grams of carbon straight out of the air. At this point, it can be cut down and it will regrow from its own stump. The wood would then have to be not burned, but instead either buried or made into objects that we plan to keep for a while, such as houses. Based on the weight of the wood, the number of trees, Wolfram Alpha found that every seven year cycle would suck, assuming I didn't make a decimal point error here, 74 parts per million of carbon dioxide out of the air. In this time, human activity would replace another 35 ppm, what with all the coal and oil we've been burning. To reduce the carbon levels from the current high of 393ppm to the pre-industrial level of 180 ppm would take 7 cycles of this -- 49 years.
This isn't going to happen. Much of the earth could not sustain a forest so thick that the branches of neighboring trees touch. There's deserts, where the trees would die from lack of water, mountains where the trees sap would freeze so hard that the tree would literally explode, beaches where the salted earth would drain the moisture back to the soil, killing the tree. We could not move our farms underground without an explosive increase of our energy use to keep our farms lit and alive, not to mention watered. And if we're not willing to install solar panels and drive hybrids for the sake of the earth, we certainly aren't willing to live like murlocks in little caves. We like the sun and the breeze and the other amenities of the surface world.
The best solution is clearly a compromise between these insane extremes. More solar, less coal, trees where it makes sense, wooden structures where it doesn't. Slow the change to the point where we can adapt to it as it comes.
Showing posts with label Mathematics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mathematics. Show all posts
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Markov Chain
Image via Wikipedia
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Spamdomness
Randomness is an interesting thing in computer science, because a computer's numbers are only pseudo-random. Computers are quite deterministic, which makes it quite difficult to produce anything random. And yet, many mathematical techniques depend on reasonably random numbers. What's a programmer to do?
Most existing pseudo-random numbers are based on things that are difficult to detect or determine ahead of time, like a statistical study of keystroke timings, mouse movements, or the thermal entropy in the various capacitors. An "entropy pool" is maintained from the study of numbers like these that accumulates enough to be sufficiently random to, say, produce an encryption key that can't readily be guessed.
When sites want a stronger randomness than that, they often resort to the study of random events outside the computer to maintain an even bigger, and more rigorous random, than can be done inside the computer itself. One common technique is to point a webcam at a television that is tuned to a non-broadcasting channel. The resulting static is effectively random data, which is fed to the entropy pool. One site, Games By Email, has an elaborate machine to throw dice and record their rolls for later use. The site also promises to melt down any die that produces a roll that a customer is not satisfied with, because the customer base tends to strongly anthropomorphize dice and sometimes want to "punish" dice that don't roll the way they want. (And why not, dice are cheap and a satisfied customer is a returning customer.)
This all gave me an idea for a cheap source of pseudo-random numbers: Spam. Spam are unwanted emails that constantly hammer servers and annoy the crap out of millions of people, all because .00001% of people take them seriously and buy stuff because of them, thus handsomely profiting the group that put them out. Most spam is today thrown away, often by automatic means before any human being ever sees it. Or if not, is tossed into a special spam box to be discarded later. Just in case a real message is falsely flagged as spam. Spammers go to elaborate lengths to ensure that the recipient looks at the message.
So, from now on, when a message is flagged as spam, we take a quick hash of it, like an MD5 sum, and then manipulate this into the entropy pool by a pseudo-random means. (Arbitrarily pick one of: Add, subtract, XOR, OR, AND, Replace, Append). This should slightly improve the quality of the entropy pool with every spam you receive. After the summing, the spam can be discarded or added to the spam box or whatever the mail receiving program was going to do with it.
I don't recommend this technique to sites in need of high quality randomness, as it leaves a gaping security hole: An attacker can spam the site with several trillion copies of the same message, thus setting the entropy pool to a known quantity, thus effectively giving the attacker control of the encryption keys. But sites like that probably have a TV static, nuclear decay, or other basically impossible to control source of random numbers in the first place. They also have a lot of money to ensuring the security of their randomness.
Most existing pseudo-random numbers are based on things that are difficult to detect or determine ahead of time, like a statistical study of keystroke timings, mouse movements, or the thermal entropy in the various capacitors. An "entropy pool" is maintained from the study of numbers like these that accumulates enough to be sufficiently random to, say, produce an encryption key that can't readily be guessed.
When sites want a stronger randomness than that, they often resort to the study of random events outside the computer to maintain an even bigger, and more rigorous random, than can be done inside the computer itself. One common technique is to point a webcam at a television that is tuned to a non-broadcasting channel. The resulting static is effectively random data, which is fed to the entropy pool. One site, Games By Email, has an elaborate machine to throw dice and record their rolls for later use. The site also promises to melt down any die that produces a roll that a customer is not satisfied with, because the customer base tends to strongly anthropomorphize dice and sometimes want to "punish" dice that don't roll the way they want. (And why not, dice are cheap and a satisfied customer is a returning customer.)
This all gave me an idea for a cheap source of pseudo-random numbers: Spam. Spam are unwanted emails that constantly hammer servers and annoy the crap out of millions of people, all because .00001% of people take them seriously and buy stuff because of them, thus handsomely profiting the group that put them out. Most spam is today thrown away, often by automatic means before any human being ever sees it. Or if not, is tossed into a special spam box to be discarded later. Just in case a real message is falsely flagged as spam. Spammers go to elaborate lengths to ensure that the recipient looks at the message.
So, from now on, when a message is flagged as spam, we take a quick hash of it, like an MD5 sum, and then manipulate this into the entropy pool by a pseudo-random means. (Arbitrarily pick one of: Add, subtract, XOR, OR, AND, Replace, Append). This should slightly improve the quality of the entropy pool with every spam you receive. After the summing, the spam can be discarded or added to the spam box or whatever the mail receiving program was going to do with it.
I don't recommend this technique to sites in need of high quality randomness, as it leaves a gaping security hole: An attacker can spam the site with several trillion copies of the same message, thus setting the entropy pool to a known quantity, thus effectively giving the attacker control of the encryption keys. But sites like that probably have a TV static, nuclear decay, or other basically impossible to control source of random numbers in the first place. They also have a lot of money to ensuring the security of their randomness.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Planar Furniture
I'm imagining a super cheap form of furniture made of boards. Boards in little shapes slapped together to form a chair, and filled with expanding foam in the middle. Or, perhaps just an "X" like shape of more boards. A board chair could be had for $10, and a board bed for $30. Board desks would be maybe $5. For the cost of a professionally made chair, one can buy an entire studio's worth of furnishings. Furnishings that can easily be taken apart and hauled away. Just one problem: They'd be ugly.
True, to make them bearable I'd want to attach lots of cushions, but their primary benefits are also their main detractions. They're going to be boxy, kludge-like in appearance, and tacky. And yet, I believe there is a big market for them with college students (who have to make the most of every cent) and nomads (who can enjoy the benefits of furnishings by being able to take them apart and haul them away.
True, to make them bearable I'd want to attach lots of cushions, but their primary benefits are also their main detractions. They're going to be boxy, kludge-like in appearance, and tacky. And yet, I believe there is a big market for them with college students (who have to make the most of every cent) and nomads (who can enjoy the benefits of furnishings by being able to take them apart and haul them away.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Colletz
XKCD brings my attention to a mathematical conjecture called the Collatz Conjecture that claims that for a particular operation, all numbers have a chain that eventually leads back to one. Read the Wikipedia article for details.
While a definite proof would win one a cool $500, computer verification only suggests that the claim is true. No proof has actually been written. Mathematical proofs via computer are beyond me, but I did, for practice, write a verifying program, as they are very very short. Mine is 32 lines long, written in C.
The program accepts one number from you, the user, and runs a collatz chain until it reaches one. It then reports the length of this chain.
A trivial change to the main would produce a program that would report the length of ALL integers until it overflowed:
The variable MAX_INT would be preset with a #define command according to the nature of the computer. Mine would be 2^64, as integers are 64-bits long on my computer.
While a definite proof would win one a cool $500, computer verification only suggests that the claim is true. No proof has actually been written. Mathematical proofs via computer are beyond me, but I did, for practice, write a verifying program, as they are very very short. Mine is 32 lines long, written in C.
#include <stdio.h>
void collatz(int);
int main(int argc, char *argv[])
{
if(argc==2)
{
int num=argv[1];
collatz(num);
}
else
{
printf("USAGE: collatz number\n");
}
return 0;
}
void collatz(int num)
{
int count=0;
while(num!=1)
{
if(num%2==0)
{
num=num/2;
}
else
{
num=num*3+1;
}
count++;
}
printf("Returned to 1 after %d cycles.\n",count);
}
The program accepts one number from you, the user, and runs a collatz chain until it reaches one. It then reports the length of this chain.
A trivial change to the main would produce a program that would report the length of ALL integers until it overflowed:
int main()
{
int num;
for(num=0;num<MAX_INT;num++)
{
printf("%d:",num);
collatz(num);
}
return 0;
}
The variable MAX_INT would be preset with a #define command according to the nature of the computer. Mine would be 2^64, as integers are 64-bits long on my computer.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Transcendental Number Theory
I have a new theory. It may be true or false, I'm not sure how to proceed in proving it.
My theory is that all numbers in the physical world are actually transcendental, and that we humans mostly use integers and rational numbers because we're rounding it to terms we understand.
A quick primer, which you can skip if you're a mathematician. Numbers come in various kinds. Natural numbers are the first we humans learned to deal with like 1, 2, 3, and so on as if you were counting apples. Integers are those and also 0 and negative numbers like -3. Rational numbers are all those that can be represented as a fraction of integers, including integers themselves. 6/1, for instance, for 6. This was all discovered by the times of the ancient Greeks. Their next discovery was irrational numbers, which cannot be expressed as a fraction of integers. The square root of 2 being the first example. If represented with our decimal system, the pattern after the decimal point would both go on forever and never repeat at any point.
Transcendental numbers are irrational, and also not any sort of square root. The most commonly referred to ones are pi and Euler's number, which are useful for circular constructs and natural growth modeling respectively. There are uncountably many transcendental numbers, but most have no easy way to reference. Mathematicians can now begin reading again.
In Engineering, there is a concept of precision. All measurements are slightly wrong. This error can be reduced by measuring more carefully, but all measurements are to within some plus-or-minus of the true value. Most serious projects reduce this error to ludicrously small values. Not zero, however, as that would take infinitely long.
Evidence against this theory includes Max Planck's discovery of graininess in the universe, where measurements below a certain threshold are no longer meaningful. This implies rational numbers.
My theory is that all numbers in the physical world are actually transcendental, and that we humans mostly use integers and rational numbers because we're rounding it to terms we understand.
A quick primer, which you can skip if you're a mathematician. Numbers come in various kinds. Natural numbers are the first we humans learned to deal with like 1, 2, 3, and so on as if you were counting apples. Integers are those and also 0 and negative numbers like -3. Rational numbers are all those that can be represented as a fraction of integers, including integers themselves. 6/1, for instance, for 6. This was all discovered by the times of the ancient Greeks. Their next discovery was irrational numbers, which cannot be expressed as a fraction of integers. The square root of 2 being the first example. If represented with our decimal system, the pattern after the decimal point would both go on forever and never repeat at any point.
Transcendental numbers are irrational, and also not any sort of square root. The most commonly referred to ones are pi and Euler's number, which are useful for circular constructs and natural growth modeling respectively. There are uncountably many transcendental numbers, but most have no easy way to reference. Mathematicians can now begin reading again.
In Engineering, there is a concept of precision. All measurements are slightly wrong. This error can be reduced by measuring more carefully, but all measurements are to within some plus-or-minus of the true value. Most serious projects reduce this error to ludicrously small values. Not zero, however, as that would take infinitely long.
Evidence against this theory includes Max Planck's discovery of graininess in the universe, where measurements below a certain threshold are no longer meaningful. This implies rational numbers.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
That Plane Treadmill Thing
There's a common internet debate that asks if a plane on a treadmill, where the treadmill moves backwards as the plane moves forwards (thereby canceling its movement), if the plane will successfully take off. Apparently, depending on how the treadmill's actions are conceived, the answer is "yes" or "Eventually."
If the treadmill matches the wheel's speeds, then the push from the engines will accelerate the plane to a speed such that it takes off, relatively quickly. Not as fast as a plane on a cement or asphalt runway, but still relatively quickly.
If, however, you insist that the conveyor belt somehow also matches the engine speed plus the wheel speed, you end up with a paradox where soon neither one can be a real number. Either the conveyor belt jams at some point, at which time the plane takes off instantly, or the wheels tear from the plane due to friction (and the now unhindered plane takes off, albeit in a state that will require a crash landing). In fact, that answer amounts to mathematical nonsense.
Why? Let us say that the plane's wheels are Wb, the conveyor belt is Wc, the plane's engines produce We. The plane's velocity, Wv, is defined by: Wv = Wb + We - Wc. If Wc = Wv, then Wb + We must equal zero. Otherwise, as Cecil Adams puts it, "A + 5 = A." Since the plane is attempting to take off, We is probably greater than zero. Therefore, Wv != Wc.
QED.
And even if you reject that, the plane's velocity will reach Aleph-1, the conveyor belt will reach Aleph-0. Aleph-1 is greater, the plane takes off. Also QED.
If the treadmill matches the wheel's speeds, then the push from the engines will accelerate the plane to a speed such that it takes off, relatively quickly. Not as fast as a plane on a cement or asphalt runway, but still relatively quickly.
If, however, you insist that the conveyor belt somehow also matches the engine speed plus the wheel speed, you end up with a paradox where soon neither one can be a real number. Either the conveyor belt jams at some point, at which time the plane takes off instantly, or the wheels tear from the plane due to friction (and the now unhindered plane takes off, albeit in a state that will require a crash landing). In fact, that answer amounts to mathematical nonsense.
Why? Let us say that the plane's wheels are Wb, the conveyor belt is Wc, the plane's engines produce We. The plane's velocity, Wv, is defined by: Wv = Wb + We - Wc. If Wc = Wv, then Wb + We must equal zero. Otherwise, as Cecil Adams puts it, "A + 5 = A." Since the plane is attempting to take off, We is probably greater than zero. Therefore, Wv != Wc.
QED.
And even if you reject that, the plane's velocity will reach Aleph-1, the conveyor belt will reach Aleph-0. Aleph-1 is greater, the plane takes off. Also QED.
Friday, December 18, 2009
Hypothetical Maximum Gas Milage
My car gets between 32 and 24 miles per gallon, depending on how I drive it. Gas milage is a big deal these days, since the price of gas usually goes up, most notably that time in 2008 when it went to $4+ per gallon in most of the US. The entire country was having an apoplexy even though much of the world willingly (or unwillingly) pays more. But it was a reminder that 8MPG big cars like SUV had significant downsides.
I often compute my miles per gallon when I fill the tank. A sudden drop is often sign that I need to refill the tires, change the air filter, or get a tuneup. But I'm left wondering, what's the hypothetical maximum for gas milage, especially when I see commercials bragging about cars whose gas milage is worse than the cheap car I own for myself. (They get 22-24 MPG and brag, several times in the commercial, about how great that is. What?)
I have to make some assumptions. A gallon of gas has 1.3*10^8J of chemical energy in it. Energy can be used to impart acceleration, depending on weight. Let me assume that the car can't be any lighter than mine, since my car is a compact car, the smallest type that Americans are typically willing to drive. (Europe and Japan have some smaller light-duty cars, because gasoline tends to be mind-bogglingly expensive there. That and space is limited.) My car weighs 800kg. Doing the math, I'm left with 162500 m^2/s^2, and left to convert this to a linear distance based on typical driving habits. I can divide by standard city acceleration patterns, which would have units of m/s^2, and be left with meters, which I can convert to miles (the MPG). A study of new york buses suggested that their acceleration was typically 2.77 m/s^2. Mine may be greater, but this seems like a reasonable figure for driving in a city. This gives me 58664.26 meters, or 36.5 MPG.
36.5MPG would, according to this, be the absolute maximum possible efficiency of a car weighing similar to mine. Achieving this level of efficiency would involve an impossible 100% efficient motor, and many other physics contrivances not practical in the real world. Better gas mileage would involve a lighter car, electric hybrid engine (to shift some of the energy to more efficient electric motors), or some other such complete re-design.
I often compute my miles per gallon when I fill the tank. A sudden drop is often sign that I need to refill the tires, change the air filter, or get a tuneup. But I'm left wondering, what's the hypothetical maximum for gas milage, especially when I see commercials bragging about cars whose gas milage is worse than the cheap car I own for myself. (They get 22-24 MPG and brag, several times in the commercial, about how great that is. What?)
I have to make some assumptions. A gallon of gas has 1.3*10^8J of chemical energy in it. Energy can be used to impart acceleration, depending on weight. Let me assume that the car can't be any lighter than mine, since my car is a compact car, the smallest type that Americans are typically willing to drive. (Europe and Japan have some smaller light-duty cars, because gasoline tends to be mind-bogglingly expensive there. That and space is limited.) My car weighs 800kg. Doing the math, I'm left with 162500 m^2/s^2, and left to convert this to a linear distance based on typical driving habits. I can divide by standard city acceleration patterns, which would have units of m/s^2, and be left with meters, which I can convert to miles (the MPG). A study of new york buses suggested that their acceleration was typically 2.77 m/s^2. Mine may be greater, but this seems like a reasonable figure for driving in a city. This gives me 58664.26 meters, or 36.5 MPG.
36.5MPG would, according to this, be the absolute maximum possible efficiency of a car weighing similar to mine. Achieving this level of efficiency would involve an impossible 100% efficient motor, and many other physics contrivances not practical in the real world. Better gas mileage would involve a lighter car, electric hybrid engine (to shift some of the energy to more efficient electric motors), or some other such complete re-design.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Turing Complete
Also way back in the 1940s, computer pioneer Alan Turing determined that having developed a certain minimum requirements, any computer can simulate any other. It has to be able to address, store, retrieve, and execute. Also, loop. Once able to do enough things, it can simulate other kinds of computers, even ones with more complicated instructions, although it will be slow as cold molasses.
This has many implications. Your fancy playstation (or whatever) game can be played on your desktop PC. Old software can be run on modern computers, with a slight performance penalty, for historical accuracy. Hardware platforms can go obsolete, but their software can still be run forever. (Although the process will get more and more aggravating with time.)
A perpetual software installation would involve moving to newer, faster machines, with a proper simulator rewritten every time there was a major architecture change.
This has many implications. Your fancy playstation (or whatever) game can be played on your desktop PC. Old software can be run on modern computers, with a slight performance penalty, for historical accuracy. Hardware platforms can go obsolete, but their software can still be run forever. (Although the process will get more and more aggravating with time.)
A perpetual software installation would involve moving to newer, faster machines, with a proper simulator rewritten every time there was a major architecture change.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Ininite Monkey Source
The Infinite Monkey Theorem states that given an endless source of random letters (such as, say, a monkey tirelessly hitting keys on a typewriter), eventually all kinds of useful things will be found within the garbage, purely by chance. All of human literature, surprising solutions to world problems, interesting medical, philosophical, and mathematical ideas are all possible, just absurdly unlikely. This of course can be compensated with more data sources (more monkey and more typewriters) and more time.
Mathematicians determined that this would work because while the chance of producing anything useful out of a random pile of letters is minuscule, it is not nonexistent. One gets a barn-megaparsec effect, which I'm naming after the totally insane unit of measurement. A barn is a ridiculously tiny measurement of area, used to measure the area of atomic collisions, and a megaparsec is an absurdly long measure of linear distance, thousands of light-years long. Multiplied together to form a measurement of volume, you get 2/3rds of a teaspoon. Practical for human use, but measured in the most ludicrous form possible. Same here, a tiny thing is multiplied by a huge thing to produce a moderate result.
The network working group even put out an April-Fools document describing how to do this on a computer: the infinite monkey protocol suite. Well, I can't put together an archiver, a literacy-recognizer, or an idea critic, but I can get you the monkey. In the C language, as I like it. Computer science readers, feel free to translate it into your own language.
Presumably the protocol maintainer would modify the main block to instead first connect to the storage-handler, then monkeytype at it, listening for signals asking it to stop.
Mathematicians determined that this would work because while the chance of producing anything useful out of a random pile of letters is minuscule, it is not nonexistent. One gets a barn-megaparsec effect, which I'm naming after the totally insane unit of measurement. A barn is a ridiculously tiny measurement of area, used to measure the area of atomic collisions, and a megaparsec is an absurdly long measure of linear distance, thousands of light-years long. Multiplied together to form a measurement of volume, you get 2/3rds of a teaspoon. Practical for human use, but measured in the most ludicrous form possible. Same here, a tiny thing is multiplied by a huge thing to produce a moderate result.
The network working group even put out an April-Fools document describing how to do this on a computer: the infinite monkey protocol suite. Well, I can't put together an archiver, a literacy-recognizer, or an idea critic, but I can get you the monkey. In the C language, as I like it. Computer science readers, feel free to translate it into your own language.
#define CONTROLCHAR 32
#define ASCIIMAX 255 - CONTROLCHAR
#include <stdio.h>
#include <stdlib.h>
#include <time.h>
char monkeytype()
{
char output; // The output character chosen by the monkey
srand(time(0)); // Randomize timer
srand(rand()); // Rerandomize. Definitely a random character now.
ouput=CONTROLCHAR + rand() % ASCIIMAX; // Produce an output character.
while(output > 126) // If it's "Delete this letter" or an other unprintable....
{
ouput=CONTROLCHAR + rand() % ASCIIMAX; // Reroll. Unprintable is not allowed.
}
return output; // When satisfied, return the letter to the main program.
}
int main()
{
char letter; // Expect a "letter."
while(input!=ctrl+c) // Okay, I forget how to really say "Until the user hits ctrl+c."
{
letter=monkeytype(); // Type a "letter."
printf(letter); // Print it out.
} // Repeat.
return 0; // All went well? Good.
}
Presumably the protocol maintainer would modify the main block to instead first connect to the storage-handler, then monkeytype at it, listening for signals asking it to stop.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Towers of Hanoi
The Towers of Hanoi is a classical computer science problem to demonstrate recursivity. Both how it can help by being the simplest solution, and how it can hurt by massively sucking resources. Recursive programs refer to themselves, each time growing larger and larger until the end conditions are met. The recursive version is always simpler, but uses more memory because it has to be loaded over and over. The non-recursive version is harder to write, but will only need to load up once and will operate efficiently after that.
The problem of the Towers posits a Buddhist temple, in Hanoi, Vietnam, that has system of three giant poles, and an enormous stack of 64 stone (or gold) disks, each larger than the other. The monks are given the task of moving all of the disks from the first pole to the third one, with two rules. One, they can only move one disk at a time, and two, they cannot place a larger disk on a smaller one. (Oh, and three: disks must move to one of the poles. No fair holding them between moves.) Legend has it that the world will end when they finish their task, so no hurry, guys.
In any case, mathematicians have proved that all cases with an even number of disks, it takes a minimum of number of moves to solve, where "n" is the number of disks.
Wikipedia's mathematicians have determined that if the monks move one disk per second (which becomes increasingly unlikely as the disks get larger), it would take 600 billion years to solve. Exponents grow very very fast. Wikipedia's article on the subject also includes a picture of a simplified wooden version, for visualization, which is nice.
In any case, the proper solution is recursive: First move the top section to pole three, then start moving the end, then stack everything on pole three, moving back and forth as to not violate the second rule. Yes, a good programmer can rewrite a non-recursive version of this that will not use a ridiculous amount of memory, but the increased complexity is mind-boggling.
So why is this important? Well, back in the 70s, the very best way to sort lists of information was discovered. It's called quicksort. Quicksort sorts long lists faster than any other method, with one problem: It's by default recursive. Any list long enough to be noticably sorted faster by quicksort would suck up all memory long before it finished sorting. Yes, a good programmer can rewrite it so as not to be recursive, but it's harder.
I suppose this also exists in other fields, where a difficult simplification makes things run better, and one must consider if it's worth doing that.
The problem of the Towers posits a Buddhist temple, in Hanoi, Vietnam, that has system of three giant poles, and an enormous stack of 64 stone (or gold) disks, each larger than the other. The monks are given the task of moving all of the disks from the first pole to the third one, with two rules. One, they can only move one disk at a time, and two, they cannot place a larger disk on a smaller one. (Oh, and three: disks must move to one of the poles. No fair holding them between moves.) Legend has it that the world will end when they finish their task, so no hurry, guys.
In any case, mathematicians have proved that all cases with an even number of disks, it takes a minimum of number of moves to solve, where "n" is the number of disks.
Wikipedia's mathematicians have determined that if the monks move one disk per second (which becomes increasingly unlikely as the disks get larger), it would take 600 billion years to solve. Exponents grow very very fast. Wikipedia's article on the subject also includes a picture of a simplified wooden version, for visualization, which is nice.
In any case, the proper solution is recursive: First move the top section to pole three, then start moving the end, then stack everything on pole three, moving back and forth as to not violate the second rule. Yes, a good programmer can rewrite a non-recursive version of this that will not use a ridiculous amount of memory, but the increased complexity is mind-boggling.
So why is this important? Well, back in the 70s, the very best way to sort lists of information was discovered. It's called quicksort. Quicksort sorts long lists faster than any other method, with one problem: It's by default recursive. Any list long enough to be noticably sorted faster by quicksort would suck up all memory long before it finished sorting. Yes, a good programmer can rewrite it so as not to be recursive, but it's harder.
I suppose this also exists in other fields, where a difficult simplification makes things run better, and one must consider if it's worth doing that.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
My own cranky beliefs
I've been enjoying Crank.net and the wacky people profiled within. Except that yesterday I noticed that I have a cranky belief myself. Ooh, the hypocrisy, it burns.
I reject Euler's equation, which I will explain below.
So if you take Euler's own constant, e, and raise it to a power involving "i," which is the square root of negative one, you get a complex number based on the variable "x." This of course gives you every mathematician's favorite equation ever:
Since this equation connects five important mathematical constants, so many mathematicians proclaim this the most beautiful equation ever invented.
Mathematical beauty is another idea that I reject. To be rude about it, it's pretty much jerking off over numbers. Oh god, yes, pi and e, so beautiful! Wank, wank, wank. My interest in math is mostly about correct measurements. Poets may claim that beauty is truth, but I expect my numbers to represent something in the physical world, and base my assumptions of their correctness on the correspondence to fact. And besides, the truth is often hideous. People are inhumanly cruel to each other, the universe doesn't care if you live or die, people have done monstrous things to each other for no good reason, and everything in the universe, you included, will eventually die. The universe itself will eventually die.
The "Beautiful equation" revolves around the cosine and sine functions. Cosine and sine are trigonometric ratios first found in triangles. In a right triangle, cosine is the ratio of the side adjacent to the angle to the hypotenuse (the long side). Sine is the ratio of the side opposite to the angle to the hypotenuse. The ratios are the same for any particular angle. Later, the metaphor was extended to circles, allowing for angles greater than 90 degrees.
In high end math, radians are used instead of degrees. In radians, the circle is divided into 2*pi sections. So 2*pi is the entire circle, pi is half the circle, and 1/2 pi is one quarter of the circle. Radians are dimensionless.
Remember Euler's equation?
Plugging in pi would result in the complex number -1 + 0i. Anything times 0 is 0, removing the imaginary part.
However, from goofing off with a calculator, I know that without the imaginary part, e to the power pi is slightly greater than 23. (It's irrational.) Throwing in imaginary numbers seems to be causing an abrupt, inexplicable change.
In fact, raising numbers to an imaginary exponent is so poorly defined that neither calculator nor amateur mathematician can explain how to do it. Natural numbered exponents are "Multiplying a number by itself that many times." a^2 = a*a, a^3 = a*a*a, and so on. Fractional exponents involve roots. a^1.5 is a times the square root of a.
So if "i" is the square root of -1, what would a^i indicate? Would it's result be real, like a, imaginary like i, complex, or something completely different?
Also, I would expect "e^xi" to be linear as x. As x increases, larger and larger results should return. If not larger along the real axis, than in total distance from the origin. However, Euler's equation is cyclical. Sine and Cosine go around in a circle, first increasing, then decreasing, then increasing again, back and forth forever. There should be a reason for this discrepancy.
Mathematicians often have a strange relationship with their numbers, and grow quite attached. When a Greek mathematician discovered irrational numbers, he was thrown off a boat for ruining their sense of mathematical order. That the other mathematicians could not disprove the existence of irrational numbers drove them absolutely crazy. It was proof that mathematics was not the pure orderly truth that they thought it was, and that it also involved messy generalities, just like real life.
I likewise suspect that Euler put together his equation on the grounds that he liked its structure, not because it actually corresponded to anything. Moreso, modern mathematicians love the idea that many of their fundamental constants are closely related. I kind of hope that I'm the one who's wrong about this, because I could take being wrong way more than they could.
I would like any commentators to describe what I got wrong, or describe a proof. A graphical proof would be the easiest to understand, but those are the hardest to construct in the first place. If someone does prove me wrong, I will add the "Stupid" tag to this post and describe their proof.
EDIT: Dr. Phillip Spencer of the university of Toronto's math department proves Euler's equation based on the Taylor series, and therefore this entire post is wrong. Having proved Euler's equation, all else follows. Well done, Dr. Spencer.
I reject Euler's equation, which I will explain below.
So if you take Euler's own constant, e, and raise it to a power involving "i," which is the square root of negative one, you get a complex number based on the variable "x." This of course gives you every mathematician's favorite equation ever:
Since this equation connects five important mathematical constants, so many mathematicians proclaim this the most beautiful equation ever invented.
Mathematical beauty is another idea that I reject. To be rude about it, it's pretty much jerking off over numbers. Oh god, yes, pi and e, so beautiful! Wank, wank, wank. My interest in math is mostly about correct measurements. Poets may claim that beauty is truth, but I expect my numbers to represent something in the physical world, and base my assumptions of their correctness on the correspondence to fact. And besides, the truth is often hideous. People are inhumanly cruel to each other, the universe doesn't care if you live or die, people have done monstrous things to each other for no good reason, and everything in the universe, you included, will eventually die. The universe itself will eventually die.
The "Beautiful equation" revolves around the cosine and sine functions. Cosine and sine are trigonometric ratios first found in triangles. In a right triangle, cosine is the ratio of the side adjacent to the angle to the hypotenuse (the long side). Sine is the ratio of the side opposite to the angle to the hypotenuse. The ratios are the same for any particular angle. Later, the metaphor was extended to circles, allowing for angles greater than 90 degrees.
In high end math, radians are used instead of degrees. In radians, the circle is divided into 2*pi sections. So 2*pi is the entire circle, pi is half the circle, and 1/2 pi is one quarter of the circle. Radians are dimensionless.
Remember Euler's equation?
Plugging in pi would result in the complex number -1 + 0i. Anything times 0 is 0, removing the imaginary part.
However, from goofing off with a calculator, I know that without the imaginary part, e to the power pi is slightly greater than 23. (It's irrational.) Throwing in imaginary numbers seems to be causing an abrupt, inexplicable change.
In fact, raising numbers to an imaginary exponent is so poorly defined that neither calculator nor amateur mathematician can explain how to do it. Natural numbered exponents are "Multiplying a number by itself that many times." a^2 = a*a, a^3 = a*a*a, and so on. Fractional exponents involve roots. a^1.5 is a times the square root of a.
So if "i" is the square root of -1, what would a^i indicate? Would it's result be real, like a, imaginary like i, complex, or something completely different?
Also, I would expect "e^xi" to be linear as x. As x increases, larger and larger results should return. If not larger along the real axis, than in total distance from the origin. However, Euler's equation is cyclical. Sine and Cosine go around in a circle, first increasing, then decreasing, then increasing again, back and forth forever. There should be a reason for this discrepancy.
Mathematicians often have a strange relationship with their numbers, and grow quite attached. When a Greek mathematician discovered irrational numbers, he was thrown off a boat for ruining their sense of mathematical order. That the other mathematicians could not disprove the existence of irrational numbers drove them absolutely crazy. It was proof that mathematics was not the pure orderly truth that they thought it was, and that it also involved messy generalities, just like real life.
I likewise suspect that Euler put together his equation on the grounds that he liked its structure, not because it actually corresponded to anything. Moreso, modern mathematicians love the idea that many of their fundamental constants are closely related. I kind of hope that I'm the one who's wrong about this, because I could take being wrong way more than they could.
I would like any commentators to describe what I got wrong, or describe a proof. A graphical proof would be the easiest to understand, but those are the hardest to construct in the first place. If someone does prove me wrong, I will add the "Stupid" tag to this post and describe their proof.
EDIT: Dr. Phillip Spencer of the university of Toronto's math department proves Euler's equation based on the Taylor series, and therefore this entire post is wrong. Having proved Euler's equation, all else follows. Well done, Dr. Spencer.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Lessons of Simulation Systems
So far I have four parts of this project detailing the requirements for jobs. I've noticed some patterns about what traits are more valuable than others. I will re-describe the traits here rather than redirect you to the first post. The traits come from three sources. One is Dungeons and Dragons, as a way of simulating a person very different from the player who controls him or her. (D&D games would be kind of dull if you had to play as yourself.)
The second is the Meyers-Briggs personality test, that notes four dichotomies in human behavior and classifies people by their preferred positions on this. In an MB test, all people have all eight traits, but express four of them more and in preference to the other four.
D&D Traits, by value:
* Charisma
The term Charisma comes from the ancient Greek idea that people with a lot of this traits were specifically blessed by the gods, and the term is Greek for "divine gift." People with lots of Charisma are charming, influential, witty, and make friends easily. Although it is a function purely of personality and mind, visual media often make use of a standard of depicting high-charisma people are more attractive to demonstrate its influence. (Strange-looking people may actually be charismatic in real life. Case in point, Adolf Hitler moved enormous crowds despite being not only bizarre looking, but a complete weirdo to boot. Plus questionably sane.)
Charisma is valued because of the way that it allows one to influence people. A primary need of companies is to influence people into giving money to the company. (By, say, buying something.) Failing that, Charisma is also useful for convincing other people that your ideas are right and should be followed. Even technicians must convince their boss that they are in fact working as best they know how and that the project they are working on is indeed a good idea.
Failing THAT too, few projects are the result of one person. Employees are expected to be "Team Players," and operate with other people without fighting or arguing. Even if the other person is wrong, obnoxious, stupid, or insufferable. Don't be insufferable, or firing you will seem like an excellent idea.
* Wisdom
Wisdom is poorly defined in D&D, but it seems to consist mostly of being observant, detail-oriented, and prudent. Having poor wisdom makes a person oblivious and impulsive. Both obliviousness and impulsiveness are bad traits in the working world, as they create additional work for at least your boss, and quite possibly more work for yourself too. Companies prefer self-directed employees that do necessary tasks without being repeatedly reminded.
Most tasks also benefit from observing the details as they fill out, to note for small problems before they become big ones. Also, like Charisma, Wisdom is purely mental. One cannot assess this trait merely at a glance.
* Intelligence
Intelligence measures a person's ability to reason and learn. Very important for white collar positions, or where training is important. Beyond a certain level, it ceases to provide benefits to something like 75% of all positions. Again, this doesn't mean that one can ignore this trait, as an ignoramus is not an attractive candidate for anything.
Most people would imagine that this trait would be very important, but that is not the case.
* Constitution
Constitution is a measure of a person's general healthiness. Medical insurance is getting expensive, and all else being equal, a person with a better constitution is preferable because they will make fewer claims and cost less. Also, they can safely work more hours, which doesn't go unnoticed.
* Dexterity
Dexterity is about being able to move both quickly and accurately. One measurement in D&D, but at least five or six different ones for real life. Most people would be fine with a moderate score in this. (But not too low. Clumsiness equals injury, equals insurance claim, equals lost money for them.) Some jobs do require higher levels, mostly those requiring precision work. Moderate dexterity should be sufficient for 75% of available jobs.
* Strength
Strength, the having of muscles and ability to use them forcefully, is actually the least useful trait for modern work. The need for muscle is mostly replaced by machines. Some athletes need it, and anyone who must physically overpower someone needs it, and anyone who needs to haul things needs it. But most modern work could be done by somebody weak as a kitten.
And now for MB traits. Again, from most valuable to least valuable for getting a job. Both Meyers and Briggs would tell me that I'm doing it wrong, that all people actually have all eight traits but that the test measures preference, and that all types are equal, but I have noticed a trend to prefer certain traits over others. Still, as a nod to Mr. Meyers and Ms. Briggs, I will note what would happen if a company was devoid of one particular trait.
* Extroversion
An extroverted person loves to talk to people and meet them and discuss things. They feel sad and unimportant if they have no one to talk to. The highest paying position require this trait. It is countered by Introversion. A company that lacked this trait entirely would be a dysfunctional group that navel-stared excessively. Marketing could not function, leading to a quick financial death.
* Sensing
Sensing people prefer to look at the little details instead of the big picture. This helps them maintain accuracy, and avoid error. Sensing people are called that because they tend to prefer to have direct tangible evidence for a proposition, instead of the indirect logic preferred by their counterpart, the Intuitive. A company that lacked this trait would be bogged down by series of small errors that quickly grew into massive problems because nobody noticed.
* Feeling
Feeling people are somewhat empathic, concerned with the feelings of other people and themselves. They tend towards artistic natures, and work hard to maintain group morale. The opposing trait is Thinking. A company lacking this trait would degenerate into perpetual office politics and trolling, and nothing useful could get done. Also, everyone would drive each other completely insane.
* Thinking
Thinking people prefer a detached style, logically considering every situation from the outside. Their style is quite useful for detecting maladaptive patterns. The opposing trait is Feeling. A company lacking this trait would waste all its time on touchy-feely exercises and never contribute useful work. (Although the workers would be remarkably sane.)
* Intuitive
The Intuitive like abstractions, the large picture, and eschew details. This helps them stay on track, as the little details would drive them mad from micromanagement. They are best convinced with an abstract and logical argument for a proposition, revolving around principles. The opposite trait is Sensing. A company lacking this trait would be unable to see a project through, as it obsessed on the small details to the detriment of the rest of the project.
* Judging
Judging types want to come to a snap decision, now. If it is the right decision, awesome. If it is the wrong decision, uh oh. A company of pure judgers would be massively impulsive, probably pathologically so. It is opposed by perceiving.
* Perceiving
Perceiving types want to delay decision making until all the information is available to them. This decision will therefore certainly be right. A company of pure perceivers would die of analysis paralysis. It is opposed by judging.
* Introversion
Introverted people want to reflect and do things by themselves. It may come last on this list, but a company starts to need introverts when it has more than 5 or so people. Pure extroverts would die of boredom doing the kind of things that introverts do. Accounting and research especially. A company lacking introverts would be easily out-competed.
For my readers: If you dislike your trait-measurements, how would you adjust them?
The second is the Meyers-Briggs personality test, that notes four dichotomies in human behavior and classifies people by their preferred positions on this. In an MB test, all people have all eight traits, but express four of them more and in preference to the other four.
D&D Traits, by value:
* Charisma
The term Charisma comes from the ancient Greek idea that people with a lot of this traits were specifically blessed by the gods, and the term is Greek for "divine gift." People with lots of Charisma are charming, influential, witty, and make friends easily. Although it is a function purely of personality and mind, visual media often make use of a standard of depicting high-charisma people are more attractive to demonstrate its influence. (Strange-looking people may actually be charismatic in real life. Case in point, Adolf Hitler moved enormous crowds despite being not only bizarre looking, but a complete weirdo to boot. Plus questionably sane.)
Charisma is valued because of the way that it allows one to influence people. A primary need of companies is to influence people into giving money to the company. (By, say, buying something.) Failing that, Charisma is also useful for convincing other people that your ideas are right and should be followed. Even technicians must convince their boss that they are in fact working as best they know how and that the project they are working on is indeed a good idea.
Failing THAT too, few projects are the result of one person. Employees are expected to be "Team Players," and operate with other people without fighting or arguing. Even if the other person is wrong, obnoxious, stupid, or insufferable. Don't be insufferable, or firing you will seem like an excellent idea.
* Wisdom
Wisdom is poorly defined in D&D, but it seems to consist mostly of being observant, detail-oriented, and prudent. Having poor wisdom makes a person oblivious and impulsive. Both obliviousness and impulsiveness are bad traits in the working world, as they create additional work for at least your boss, and quite possibly more work for yourself too. Companies prefer self-directed employees that do necessary tasks without being repeatedly reminded.
Most tasks also benefit from observing the details as they fill out, to note for small problems before they become big ones. Also, like Charisma, Wisdom is purely mental. One cannot assess this trait merely at a glance.
* Intelligence
Intelligence measures a person's ability to reason and learn. Very important for white collar positions, or where training is important. Beyond a certain level, it ceases to provide benefits to something like 75% of all positions. Again, this doesn't mean that one can ignore this trait, as an ignoramus is not an attractive candidate for anything.
Most people would imagine that this trait would be very important, but that is not the case.
* Constitution
Constitution is a measure of a person's general healthiness. Medical insurance is getting expensive, and all else being equal, a person with a better constitution is preferable because they will make fewer claims and cost less. Also, they can safely work more hours, which doesn't go unnoticed.
* Dexterity
Dexterity is about being able to move both quickly and accurately. One measurement in D&D, but at least five or six different ones for real life. Most people would be fine with a moderate score in this. (But not too low. Clumsiness equals injury, equals insurance claim, equals lost money for them.) Some jobs do require higher levels, mostly those requiring precision work. Moderate dexterity should be sufficient for 75% of available jobs.
* Strength
Strength, the having of muscles and ability to use them forcefully, is actually the least useful trait for modern work. The need for muscle is mostly replaced by machines. Some athletes need it, and anyone who must physically overpower someone needs it, and anyone who needs to haul things needs it. But most modern work could be done by somebody weak as a kitten.
And now for MB traits. Again, from most valuable to least valuable for getting a job. Both Meyers and Briggs would tell me that I'm doing it wrong, that all people actually have all eight traits but that the test measures preference, and that all types are equal, but I have noticed a trend to prefer certain traits over others. Still, as a nod to Mr. Meyers and Ms. Briggs, I will note what would happen if a company was devoid of one particular trait.
* Extroversion
An extroverted person loves to talk to people and meet them and discuss things. They feel sad and unimportant if they have no one to talk to. The highest paying position require this trait. It is countered by Introversion. A company that lacked this trait entirely would be a dysfunctional group that navel-stared excessively. Marketing could not function, leading to a quick financial death.
* Sensing
Sensing people prefer to look at the little details instead of the big picture. This helps them maintain accuracy, and avoid error. Sensing people are called that because they tend to prefer to have direct tangible evidence for a proposition, instead of the indirect logic preferred by their counterpart, the Intuitive. A company that lacked this trait would be bogged down by series of small errors that quickly grew into massive problems because nobody noticed.
* Feeling
Feeling people are somewhat empathic, concerned with the feelings of other people and themselves. They tend towards artistic natures, and work hard to maintain group morale. The opposing trait is Thinking. A company lacking this trait would degenerate into perpetual office politics and trolling, and nothing useful could get done. Also, everyone would drive each other completely insane.
* Thinking
Thinking people prefer a detached style, logically considering every situation from the outside. Their style is quite useful for detecting maladaptive patterns. The opposing trait is Feeling. A company lacking this trait would waste all its time on touchy-feely exercises and never contribute useful work. (Although the workers would be remarkably sane.)
* Intuitive
The Intuitive like abstractions, the large picture, and eschew details. This helps them stay on track, as the little details would drive them mad from micromanagement. They are best convinced with an abstract and logical argument for a proposition, revolving around principles. The opposite trait is Sensing. A company lacking this trait would be unable to see a project through, as it obsessed on the small details to the detriment of the rest of the project.
* Judging
Judging types want to come to a snap decision, now. If it is the right decision, awesome. If it is the wrong decision, uh oh. A company of pure judgers would be massively impulsive, probably pathologically so. It is opposed by perceiving.
* Perceiving
Perceiving types want to delay decision making until all the information is available to them. This decision will therefore certainly be right. A company of pure perceivers would die of analysis paralysis. It is opposed by judging.
* Introversion
Introverted people want to reflect and do things by themselves. It may come last on this list, but a company starts to need introverts when it has more than 5 or so people. Pure extroverts would die of boredom doing the kind of things that introverts do. Accounting and research especially. A company lacking introverts would be easily out-competed.
For my readers: If you dislike your trait-measurements, how would you adjust them?
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Simulation Systems, Tests, and Your Employment (Part 4)
These series have been reasonably successful. How about one more? Read the explanation on part 1, or read parts 2 or 3 for more jobs and their requirements.
Butler
Requirements: High constitution, moderate dexterity, high charisma
Yes, people still hire butlers. As a butler, you will do a rich persons menial labor, freeing them up to make even more money. Expect to work 18 hour days doing mindless crap, while wearing a tuxedo and looking good doing it.
In the English-speaking world, it also helps to have an upper-class British accent. In the UK, this helps your boss feel that you are classy like he or she is, and in the former colonies of the UK, this helps them to feel like they are the aristocratic type that they were born in the wrong place and 100 years too late to be.
Police Officer
Requirements: High Strength, high body dexterity, high finger dexterity, lawful alignment, moderate charisma
As a police officer, you will patrol the streets and enforce the law. Society needs as many of these kinds of people as possible, right? Unfortunately, you will be quite unpopular.
Why? For one, as a police officer, you will be telling people no. No, they cannot have a noisy party at 3am. No, they cannot exceed the speed limit "just this once." No, they cannot read their porn magazine in public where easily offended people and children can see it. No, they cannot smoke that joint, or even have it. No, you cannot spray-paint rude things on the boss's house, even if he is a total twit.
For another, there are two kinds of people that really want to be police officers. One is inherently concerned with social justice, but the other one really likes to boss people around and is a twit. People assume that most police officers are going to be the second kind, especially if they have met this type of person before, and rest assured that they probably have.
The last issue about it is that police work will often confront you with the worst kinds of people that humankind has to offer, and your usual attitude will soon run along the lines of "Okay, what is that asswipe up to this time?" Police work may change you into a ranging misanthrope.
Actor
Requirements: High constitution, Very high charisma, ability to express emotions different than those you're actually feeling, artistic nature
Many people want to be actors. There's fame, and the top tiers of acting pays a fortune. In addition, actors are crucial to the production of plays and movies, which most aspiring actors love.
The bad news of this is that since so many people want to be actors, very few of them actually achieve it. Directors can be very picky about the people who play their parts, specifying them very very precisely, and ensuring that they are very skilled at what they do. Have a day job before you even try. You can always quit it if you get that big part.
Help Desk
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Charisma, Extensive computer knowledge
This entry-level computer industry job involves you answering people's questions about computers. Questions such as "How do I insert graphics into my spreadsheet?" and "It says 'Illegal Operation,' what does that mean?" Typically, you will be doing this by phone, and people will call upon you incessantly.
You must answer their every question, even if it is explicitly spelled out in the manual that they refused to read, even if it is immensely stupid, and even if they scream insults at you in the process. Expect more invective if they cannot recover from their problem, like if they lost 20 pages of typing due to a crash. Maybe you can't solve the problem, but the company pays you to endure the frustrated ventings.
Offshore Oil Worker
Requirements: High Strength, High Constitution, willingness to be away from home for the entire working week
As an offshore oil worker, you fly to a godforsaken oil platform somewhere in the ocean (probably near the shore, but don't count on it), first thing Monday morning. You haul around heavy machinery, fix problems, and keep the oil flowing, day in, and day out. You sleep in quarters in the platform, which are probably cramped, shared, or both. You work until Friday night, at which time you are flown back to the mainland to go home.
Lonely, difficult. Pays well. Perfect for the person who hates their home life.
Medical Test Subject
Requirements: Complete lack of self respect, or superhuman love of the medical sciences
Got some condition doctors really want to explore? Don't mind enduring weird chemicals for the sake of science? Have no ability scores whatsoever and still need to make a living? Consider the fun field of medical testing! See if substance X82-A really is toxic! See if the new remedy for the common cold involves certain...side effects...that the rats didn't have! Determine if our latest surgery is survivable! I'm kidding about one of these!
Sewer Maintenance
Requirements: High Constitution, Ability to walk through water which certainly contains poop, Slight mechanical aptitude, Acceptable dexterity
I hear they have a union and make considerable money.
Advertising Copywriter
Requirements: Very high charisma, High writing ability, Probably high intelligence
You write ads. Some of these ads are scripts for television or radio commercials. Others are direct text for newspaper or magazine ads. In any case, your boss wants to sell something, and you have to make it interesting for people. They have to see your ad and want it.
Unfortunately for you, you will usually be operating in a hostile environment. Be it television, radio, internet, or magazines, most people find the ad a jarring annoyance to get past as quickly as possible. People only really like advertising in the phone book.
Spammer
Requirements: Computer knowledge, Chaotic Evil alignment, soul blacker than a coal mine, complete internet sociopathy
As a spammer, you put out all those stupid emails hawking viagra, penis pills, and things of a dubious nature. You must know how to send millions of emails a second, as 99.9999999% of the emails you send will be thrown out with, at best, a press of the delete key and a wish for your imminent demise. Some people will never see it at all, as spam filters intercept it and wisk it away to a folder of unwanted crap, to be auto-deleted after 90 days.
Of course, one idiot in a million will either be a total gullible moron, or a lonely old person who'll buy the stuff just to have someone to talk to. So for spamming a quadrillion computers, you make about 10 sales, for a profit of, I'm guessing $40. Also, I hate you.
Social Worker
Requirements: High Charisma, High Wisdom, Eternal Optimism, non evil alignment
As a social worker, you must investigate families who are suspected of doing it wrong. And by doing it wrong, I mean child abuse and neglect. Sometimes this is thankfully baseless. And sometimes it's completely warranted. You must maintain an upbeat attitude, even when removing the children from their home.
Social work may make you despair.
Butler
Requirements: High constitution, moderate dexterity, high charisma
Yes, people still hire butlers. As a butler, you will do a rich persons menial labor, freeing them up to make even more money. Expect to work 18 hour days doing mindless crap, while wearing a tuxedo and looking good doing it.
In the English-speaking world, it also helps to have an upper-class British accent. In the UK, this helps your boss feel that you are classy like he or she is, and in the former colonies of the UK, this helps them to feel like they are the aristocratic type that they were born in the wrong place and 100 years too late to be.
Police Officer
Requirements: High Strength, high body dexterity, high finger dexterity, lawful alignment, moderate charisma
As a police officer, you will patrol the streets and enforce the law. Society needs as many of these kinds of people as possible, right? Unfortunately, you will be quite unpopular.
Why? For one, as a police officer, you will be telling people no. No, they cannot have a noisy party at 3am. No, they cannot exceed the speed limit "just this once." No, they cannot read their porn magazine in public where easily offended people and children can see it. No, they cannot smoke that joint, or even have it. No, you cannot spray-paint rude things on the boss's house, even if he is a total twit.
For another, there are two kinds of people that really want to be police officers. One is inherently concerned with social justice, but the other one really likes to boss people around and is a twit. People assume that most police officers are going to be the second kind, especially if they have met this type of person before, and rest assured that they probably have.
The last issue about it is that police work will often confront you with the worst kinds of people that humankind has to offer, and your usual attitude will soon run along the lines of "Okay, what is that asswipe up to this time?" Police work may change you into a ranging misanthrope.
Actor
Requirements: High constitution, Very high charisma, ability to express emotions different than those you're actually feeling, artistic nature
Many people want to be actors. There's fame, and the top tiers of acting pays a fortune. In addition, actors are crucial to the production of plays and movies, which most aspiring actors love.
The bad news of this is that since so many people want to be actors, very few of them actually achieve it. Directors can be very picky about the people who play their parts, specifying them very very precisely, and ensuring that they are very skilled at what they do. Have a day job before you even try. You can always quit it if you get that big part.
Help Desk
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Charisma, Extensive computer knowledge
This entry-level computer industry job involves you answering people's questions about computers. Questions such as "How do I insert graphics into my spreadsheet?" and "It says 'Illegal Operation,' what does that mean?" Typically, you will be doing this by phone, and people will call upon you incessantly.
You must answer their every question, even if it is explicitly spelled out in the manual that they refused to read, even if it is immensely stupid, and even if they scream insults at you in the process. Expect more invective if they cannot recover from their problem, like if they lost 20 pages of typing due to a crash. Maybe you can't solve the problem, but the company pays you to endure the frustrated ventings.
Offshore Oil Worker
Requirements: High Strength, High Constitution, willingness to be away from home for the entire working week
As an offshore oil worker, you fly to a godforsaken oil platform somewhere in the ocean (probably near the shore, but don't count on it), first thing Monday morning. You haul around heavy machinery, fix problems, and keep the oil flowing, day in, and day out. You sleep in quarters in the platform, which are probably cramped, shared, or both. You work until Friday night, at which time you are flown back to the mainland to go home.
Lonely, difficult. Pays well. Perfect for the person who hates their home life.
Medical Test Subject
Requirements: Complete lack of self respect, or superhuman love of the medical sciences
Got some condition doctors really want to explore? Don't mind enduring weird chemicals for the sake of science? Have no ability scores whatsoever and still need to make a living? Consider the fun field of medical testing! See if substance X82-A really is toxic! See if the new remedy for the common cold involves certain...side effects...that the rats didn't have! Determine if our latest surgery is survivable! I'm kidding about one of these!
Sewer Maintenance
Requirements: High Constitution, Ability to walk through water which certainly contains poop, Slight mechanical aptitude, Acceptable dexterity
I hear they have a union and make considerable money.
Advertising Copywriter
Requirements: Very high charisma, High writing ability, Probably high intelligence
You write ads. Some of these ads are scripts for television or radio commercials. Others are direct text for newspaper or magazine ads. In any case, your boss wants to sell something, and you have to make it interesting for people. They have to see your ad and want it.
Unfortunately for you, you will usually be operating in a hostile environment. Be it television, radio, internet, or magazines, most people find the ad a jarring annoyance to get past as quickly as possible. People only really like advertising in the phone book.
Spammer
Requirements: Computer knowledge, Chaotic Evil alignment, soul blacker than a coal mine, complete internet sociopathy
As a spammer, you put out all those stupid emails hawking viagra, penis pills, and things of a dubious nature. You must know how to send millions of emails a second, as 99.9999999% of the emails you send will be thrown out with, at best, a press of the delete key and a wish for your imminent demise. Some people will never see it at all, as spam filters intercept it and wisk it away to a folder of unwanted crap, to be auto-deleted after 90 days.
Of course, one idiot in a million will either be a total gullible moron, or a lonely old person who'll buy the stuff just to have someone to talk to. So for spamming a quadrillion computers, you make about 10 sales, for a profit of, I'm guessing $40. Also, I hate you.
Social Worker
Requirements: High Charisma, High Wisdom, Eternal Optimism, non evil alignment
As a social worker, you must investigate families who are suspected of doing it wrong. And by doing it wrong, I mean child abuse and neglect. Sometimes this is thankfully baseless. And sometimes it's completely warranted. You must maintain an upbeat attitude, even when removing the children from their home.
Social work may make you despair.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Happy Pi Day
In America, today's date is written 3/14. Yes, I know other countries do it differently. Anyway, the 3-14 part is reminiscent of the first digits of the mathematical constant Pi, 3.14. Pi appears quite a bit in engineering, certainly if you're working with anything that is in any way circular or round. So I'm going to give you some facts about pi.
Pi is irrational, meaning that it cannot be represented as a fraction and would go on forever if written down in our traditional decimal format. It is also transcendental, meaning that it is also not the square root of any rational number either. There are hypothetically an infinite number of irrational transcendent numbers, but only a few have any real use.
For most engineering concerns, 355/113 is close enough. This is 8.49 x 10^-6% (.00000849%) away from the actual value. Engineers would never need more than 39 digits, which would calculate the diameter of a circle the size of the entire universe and not be more inaccurate than the width of a proton. However, pure mathematicians have, for the sake of accuracy alone, calculated pi down to quadrillions of digits.
Pi was discovered at about the same time by the ancient Greek, Babylonian, and Chinese mathematicians. Accuracy of Pi has improved over the centuries, but perfect accuracy isn't needed for many engineering procedures. The Babylonians had it recorded as 25/8 (3.125), but still had circular columns.
If you have a computer or calculator available to you, and it for some reason does not have a pre-recorded Pi constant, you can generate Pi as 4*arctan(1). Make sure your calculator is set to radians, not degrees.
Pi also shows up in a number of statistical functions.
Pi is irrational, meaning that it cannot be represented as a fraction and would go on forever if written down in our traditional decimal format. It is also transcendental, meaning that it is also not the square root of any rational number either. There are hypothetically an infinite number of irrational transcendent numbers, but only a few have any real use.
For most engineering concerns, 355/113 is close enough. This is 8.49 x 10^-6% (.00000849%) away from the actual value. Engineers would never need more than 39 digits, which would calculate the diameter of a circle the size of the entire universe and not be more inaccurate than the width of a proton. However, pure mathematicians have, for the sake of accuracy alone, calculated pi down to quadrillions of digits.
Pi was discovered at about the same time by the ancient Greek, Babylonian, and Chinese mathematicians. Accuracy of Pi has improved over the centuries, but perfect accuracy isn't needed for many engineering procedures. The Babylonians had it recorded as 25/8 (3.125), but still had circular columns.
If you have a computer or calculator available to you, and it for some reason does not have a pre-recorded Pi constant, you can generate Pi as 4*arctan(1). Make sure your calculator is set to radians, not degrees.
Pi also shows up in a number of statistical functions.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Simulation Systems, Tests, and Your Employment (Part 3)
So with some nerdy introspection, I think everyone can find the perfect job, as I described in the last two sessions. Let's do some more.
Cashier
Requirements: Moderate Intelligence, Moderate Charisma, High Finger Dexterity, Known moral prohibition against stealing
Cashiers take people's money in exchange for the good or service. One has to accurately count money quickly, and not offend your patron too badly. It is also important to your employer to know that you will not take the money in the register, or overcharge the client to pad your own pocket.
Card Dealer
Requirements: Really high finger dexterity, Acceptable Charisma
Casinos need lots of these for all their card tables. The slicker and craftier you are with your cards, the better.
Cook
Requirements: High-ish finger and arm dexterity, excellent hygine, artistic talent on the higher end
People like food. People like their food well prepared. People who pay lots of money for food expect it to be artistic also. People don't like contaminated food.
Collections Agent
Requirements: High-ish strength, Moderate Charisma, Moderate Wisdom, Chaotic alignment
When people don't pay for the things they use, such as a credit default, bounced checks, and so on, collections has to take their things back. And since your subject would prefer to keep the goods without paying for them, you must, in essence, steal them back. Yes, this is legal, provided that one can prove the debt of your subject and his or her non-payment. Wanting to steal falls under the "Chaotic" alignments of D&D, so one must be that way. Although being organized doesn't fall under "Chaotic" but that trait also helps.
Lawyer
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Exceptional literacy, High Charisma, ideally lawful evil alignment, Moderate Constitution (you will spend much of the day standing)
Lawyers must be well organized, well prepared, have several dictionaries worth of text memorized, convincing, and will often be expected to argue things that they know aren't true. The willingness to take on these kinds of positions are in super-high demand, as the criminal justice field grows (all suspects are entitled to a proper defense under American law), as well as corporate clients who have their own...interests...to promote. (This willingness to fight for known untrue positions falls under the "evil" side of D&D's morality axis, since a "good" person would insist on the truth in all cases. Few people would want to hire a "good" lawyer, as they'd throw the case at the first sign of trouble.) Lawyers are well despised, but only by people who don't need one. Those who do definitely appreciate theirs. Lastly, lawyers often make huge amounts of money, which makes the populace at large hate them even more out of envy.
Judge
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Memorization of Case Law, Loud speaking voice, probably being a lawyer first, ideally lawful neutral.
Judges mediate courtroom actions. In some jurisdictions, they're appointed by the elected government, in others they are elected by the people. In any case, when lawyers disagree on the facts, they must intervene based on past case law.
Judging is high profile, but your powers aren't actually all that great. Any decision you make can be overturned, and if you make your decisions corruptly, firing is the best you can hope for. The worst involves jail time.
Paleontologist
Requirements: High-ish intelligence, Very high Wisdom, High constitution, high arm and finger dexterity, moderate strength
A paleontologist is a scientist of fossils and old artifacts. They must locate them with, possibly with a geologist's help, dig them up, being very careful not to damage the fossils, which could easily be confused with the rest of the rock they're digging through, and take careful notes about what was found, where it was found, what was dug through,and how deep they had to dig.
Paleontologists share their findings with other scientists to make conclusions about what they found, such as nuclear scientists to perform carbon dating, geologists to learn about the earth conditions that preserved the item, and museums who publicize the work.
Carpenter
Requirements: Significant strength, Moderate constitution, Acceptable Wisdom, Enough dexterity as to not hit yourself in the foot
As long as there is wood, there will be people wanting it arranged into structures, like houses, gazebos and so on.
Fisherman
Requirements: High strength, resistance to seasickness
People like eating fish. Go get them some.
Miner
Requirements: High strength, moderate dexterity, not claustrophobic
Lots of goods come from underground rocks. If you can dig them up, give us a call.
Undertaker
Requirements: High strength, moderate dexterity, moderate charisma, organizational skills
When people die, they want to hold a proper funeral. This is where Undertakers come in. They have to dig the grave, make it look nice, prepare the props of a funeral, and make sure that only one family has a funeral at one time, because it's very awkward for everyone involved when they clash. Also, it's bad for business not to properly express your condolences, but it's worse still for business to express your condolences in a creepy way. Better not put your foot in your mouth here, champ.
Pet Caretaker
Requirements: High Constitution, Affinity for animals, Reasonable dexterity
Pets need various degrees of care. Dogs need to be walked. Cats need to have the litterbox changed before they decide that the sock drawer is a better option. Birds need outside play time. Rabbits need assurance. All of the above need food, water, and cleaning up. Sometimes a pet's human owners need to leave the pet alone, such as for a business trip. The pet is sad, and would be in trouble if not for you.
Jobs here are usually specialized per species, like dog walker, cat cleaner, rabbit caretaker and so on.
You know what, I think there'll be a part four. If all the Dirty Jobs I've been watching is any indication, it's that one can earn a living doing the darnedest things. You can even earn a living watching television, but there's a catch.
No, you probably won't earn a living blogging.
Cashier
Requirements: Moderate Intelligence, Moderate Charisma, High Finger Dexterity, Known moral prohibition against stealing
Cashiers take people's money in exchange for the good or service. One has to accurately count money quickly, and not offend your patron too badly. It is also important to your employer to know that you will not take the money in the register, or overcharge the client to pad your own pocket.
Card Dealer
Requirements: Really high finger dexterity, Acceptable Charisma
Casinos need lots of these for all their card tables. The slicker and craftier you are with your cards, the better.
Cook
Requirements: High-ish finger and arm dexterity, excellent hygine, artistic talent on the higher end
People like food. People like their food well prepared. People who pay lots of money for food expect it to be artistic also. People don't like contaminated food.
Collections Agent
Requirements: High-ish strength, Moderate Charisma, Moderate Wisdom, Chaotic alignment
When people don't pay for the things they use, such as a credit default, bounced checks, and so on, collections has to take their things back. And since your subject would prefer to keep the goods without paying for them, you must, in essence, steal them back. Yes, this is legal, provided that one can prove the debt of your subject and his or her non-payment. Wanting to steal falls under the "Chaotic" alignments of D&D, so one must be that way. Although being organized doesn't fall under "Chaotic" but that trait also helps.
Lawyer
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Exceptional literacy, High Charisma, ideally lawful evil alignment, Moderate Constitution (you will spend much of the day standing)
Lawyers must be well organized, well prepared, have several dictionaries worth of text memorized, convincing, and will often be expected to argue things that they know aren't true. The willingness to take on these kinds of positions are in super-high demand, as the criminal justice field grows (all suspects are entitled to a proper defense under American law), as well as corporate clients who have their own...interests...to promote. (This willingness to fight for known untrue positions falls under the "evil" side of D&D's morality axis, since a "good" person would insist on the truth in all cases. Few people would want to hire a "good" lawyer, as they'd throw the case at the first sign of trouble.) Lawyers are well despised, but only by people who don't need one. Those who do definitely appreciate theirs. Lastly, lawyers often make huge amounts of money, which makes the populace at large hate them even more out of envy.
Judge
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Memorization of Case Law, Loud speaking voice, probably being a lawyer first, ideally lawful neutral.
Judges mediate courtroom actions. In some jurisdictions, they're appointed by the elected government, in others they are elected by the people. In any case, when lawyers disagree on the facts, they must intervene based on past case law.
Judging is high profile, but your powers aren't actually all that great. Any decision you make can be overturned, and if you make your decisions corruptly, firing is the best you can hope for. The worst involves jail time.
Paleontologist
Requirements: High-ish intelligence, Very high Wisdom, High constitution, high arm and finger dexterity, moderate strength
A paleontologist is a scientist of fossils and old artifacts. They must locate them with, possibly with a geologist's help, dig them up, being very careful not to damage the fossils, which could easily be confused with the rest of the rock they're digging through, and take careful notes about what was found, where it was found, what was dug through,and how deep they had to dig.
Paleontologists share their findings with other scientists to make conclusions about what they found, such as nuclear scientists to perform carbon dating, geologists to learn about the earth conditions that preserved the item, and museums who publicize the work.
Carpenter
Requirements: Significant strength, Moderate constitution, Acceptable Wisdom, Enough dexterity as to not hit yourself in the foot
As long as there is wood, there will be people wanting it arranged into structures, like houses, gazebos and so on.
Fisherman
Requirements: High strength, resistance to seasickness
People like eating fish. Go get them some.
Miner
Requirements: High strength, moderate dexterity, not claustrophobic
Lots of goods come from underground rocks. If you can dig them up, give us a call.
Undertaker
Requirements: High strength, moderate dexterity, moderate charisma, organizational skills
When people die, they want to hold a proper funeral. This is where Undertakers come in. They have to dig the grave, make it look nice, prepare the props of a funeral, and make sure that only one family has a funeral at one time, because it's very awkward for everyone involved when they clash. Also, it's bad for business not to properly express your condolences, but it's worse still for business to express your condolences in a creepy way. Better not put your foot in your mouth here, champ.
Pet Caretaker
Requirements: High Constitution, Affinity for animals, Reasonable dexterity
Pets need various degrees of care. Dogs need to be walked. Cats need to have the litterbox changed before they decide that the sock drawer is a better option. Birds need outside play time. Rabbits need assurance. All of the above need food, water, and cleaning up. Sometimes a pet's human owners need to leave the pet alone, such as for a business trip. The pet is sad, and would be in trouble if not for you.
Jobs here are usually specialized per species, like dog walker, cat cleaner, rabbit caretaker and so on.
You know what, I think there'll be a part four. If all the Dirty Jobs I've been watching is any indication, it's that one can earn a living doing the darnedest things. You can even earn a living watching television, but there's a catch.
No, you probably won't earn a living blogging.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Simulation Systems, Tests, and Your Employment (Part 2)
Okay, assuming that you read the first part and have measured yourself, let's continue. Hopefully you weren't found to be wanting.
Let's go hit the employment center:
Sales
Requirements: High Charisma, Extrovert personality type
A salesperson must convince people to buy the product or service of this company. This turns production into money, which is highly desired by all organizations, or, more abstractly, can help turn people towards your organization's point of view, which is also kind of like selling. Extroverts are preferred because you will deal with people constantly, and an introvert would be driven insane in short order.
Demand for this job is effectively unlimited, which is why I listed it first.
System Administrator
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Introverted Intuitive personality type
A system administrator must manage a large computer, or perhaps many of them. He or she must manage the needs of various users, prevent crashes, prevent illegitimate access to the system, and maintain backups, both in case of destruction of the computer and in case of "oops, I accidentally erased a critical file."
Hair Stylist
Requirements: High Wisdom, High Finger Dexterity, Sensing personality type
Hair stylists cut hair into interesting styles, obviously. Also, dying, shaving, and other things people want done to their hair. They are an artist...of hair.
Chemist
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Moderate Finger Dexterity, Sensing personality type, probably preferably introverted.
A chemist mixes chemicals together and notes how they react. Chemists are usually employed to discover new drugs, but are also necessary in many other industries that want new and better materials. Chemists must be observant, meticulous, and must avoid spilling things on themselves. They should also run quickly, in case they dospill things on themselves.
CEO
Requirements: High Charisma, High Intelligence, Extroverted personality type
CEO stands for Central Executive Officer. They run companies. Their job is to make decisions, and justify them. If these decisions are good, the company prospers, but if the decision is made poorly, they company is in serious trouble. CEOs must also justify their decisions before shareholders and the media. There is a big demand for CEOs, especially because those known to make good decisions are in very short supply. (Despite the enormous salary, few people genuinely qualify. Too bad for me, because I would sure love to be paid $29 million per year.)
Plumber
Requirements: High Wisdom, High Finger Dexterity, willingness to be very very dirty
Plumbers have to build piping systems and fix them when they go wrong. Since pipes can have either clean water or, ehm, used water, the plumber can easily be very dirty indeed when fixing the used water pipes. Which they must have to personally clean.
Bouncer
Requirements: High Strength, Moderate Constitution, Moderate Willpower (is that Wisdom or something else?)
Bouncers eject unruly people from bars, clubs, and similar establishments. They must physically overpower these people, who are often drunk, insane, or infinitely furious. The ejected people have been known to try bargaining, weapons, blows to the groin, pleading, and where applicable, sexual favors. A bouncer must be able to overcome any of these, as anyone ordered ejected is probably up to no good.
Physicist
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Intuitive personality type, (and possibly introvert)
Physicists try to find reality's rules, and describe them with math. Demand for this job is very low now, particularly because the atomic bomb has already been discovered.
Athletes (in general)
Requirements: High Strength, High Constitution, High Body Dexterity, High Finger Dexterity
Many young children aspire to be athletes when they grow up, but only the most powerful can really succeed at it. The requirements are rather high, depending on the sport, there is a lot of competition for the position, and success cannot ever really be guaranteed, since many people are aspiring to be #1 at any cost.
Teacher
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, High Constitution, Moderate Charisma
Teachers teach people new skills. You need to understand the information, figure out how to explain it, and do the explanation. At the lower grades, you must also prevent the students from distracting each other, and develop immunity as you will be repeatedly sneezed on.
Also, the pay is rather terrible, at least in America.
Medical Practitioner
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Intuitive personality type, High Constitution
People come to you sick, and you figure out the problem and devise a solution. You'll need to be smart enough to pass medical school (which is very hard and takes about 7 years for most people), you'll need to be observant, and you'll need to avoid being personally infected.
Poet
Requirements: Moderate Intelligence, Moderate Wisdom, Moderate Finger Dexterity, Verbosity
If a rose had another name
would it smell as sweet?
For a person of many words
this job just can't be beat
Though you'll not make much bread
t'would be good for your head
to express thine own words on a sheet.
Of, you know, paper.
Surgeon
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, High Finger Dexterity
Surgeons specialize in healing people by, counter intuitively, cutting them open and moving their parts around. Surgeons need to excise harmful tissues, such as cancer, repair internal damage via sewing, implant devices to improve quality of life, (pacemakers, cochlear implants, and so on), and ultimately sew up their patient so that they can heal.
Surgeons can be more antisocial than other doctors, as they need not ever interact with their patient when the patient is conscious.
Jeweler
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, High Wisdom
People love gold and silver and platinum and various gems, but what they love even more are those things in a form they can wear on their body. Of course, jewelry doesn't exist until shaped out of its component materials, so this is where you step in.
Psychologist
Requirements: High Intelligence, Patience, Lack of irritation at constant dissembling, Feeling personality type
You can tell them about those scary dreams you've been having, you can tell them about your mother, you can tell them about your fears and anxieties, and they'll listen. Psychologists will listen to what they are told, and will look into the condition of your mind. If you'll listen, they'll suggest things you can do to improve your life.
Of course, many people will endlessly unload and ignore even the most blatantly obvious suggestions, and some people problems are caused not by a problematic life, but by problems with their brain. If the patient refuses to listen, well, that's hardly the psychologist's problem.
If the problem is in their brain, that's where the big-brother of psychologists comes in, the psychiatrist. A psychiatrist is a psychologist with additional medical training, so as to be able to prescribe drugs. The pills will make the voices go away, we hope. If not, there are other pills and therapies.
In a big fit of irony, the founder of psychology was mind-bogglingly insane.
Electrician
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, Moderate Body Dexterity, Moderate-High Intelligence, Moderate Wisdom
Electricians create and repair electrical power systems. They need to place wires, remove damaged ones, ensure the smooth flow of electricity, and not get electrocuted.
Engineer
Requirements: High Intelligence, Moderate Strength, Intuitive personality type
Engineers create machines and structures to solve problems. The machine needs to work, and work well, so an engineer needs to understand physics, chemistry, and a bit of biology.
Politician
Requirements: High Charisma, Extroverted Personality Type, Other things that we're not sure of
Politicians run for government offices. Most of them have big ideas of things they should be doing.
Mechanic
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, Moderate Strength
Mechanics fix broken machines. Most often cars.
Military (lower ranks)
Requirements: High Strength, High Body Dexterity, High Constitution, Willingness to follow orders
Be it the Army, the Navy, the Air Force, or some other branch of the armed services, the most common military job is Infantry, which involves running around someplace while being shot at, and shooting back, all to serve your respective country's national interests.
Soldiers need high strength, so they can hurl bayonets into oncoming enemies, High Body dexterity to dodge projectiles, and high constitution so that they don't immediately die from wounds, disease, and other horrors of the battlefield.
There are other military jobs, but you'd better do them exceedingly well if you hope to stay out of infantry. Because every armed force needs lots of that, but few people want to do it.
Military (higher ranks)
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, High Charisma, Having been a lower-ranked officer and being promoted a lot
In the higher ranks of the armed services, you no longer do the fighting yourself, but now have to manage the fighting efforts of other people so that your nation wins. You'll need to be smart, observant, and justify your every decision to both your boss and quite possibly the media. Many wars can also bog down into a quagmire politically, which quickly becomes a no-win situation for you, you poor bastard.
Speaking of the media, you'll need to convince them that your nation is awesome and you are totally winning the war, which will end sometime next month in total victory. Even if any or all this is obviously untrue.
Electronic Engineer
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Sensing Personality Type
Electronic engineer creates things that use electricity to accomplish a task. They need to be able to place components accurately and without damaging them, to know enough about the components and how they work to make their boards accomplish tasks, and to debug problems that arise.
Of course there are more jobs, but I'll cover them in a later entry, as this one is already excessively long.
Let's go hit the employment center:
Sales
Requirements: High Charisma, Extrovert personality type
A salesperson must convince people to buy the product or service of this company. This turns production into money, which is highly desired by all organizations, or, more abstractly, can help turn people towards your organization's point of view, which is also kind of like selling. Extroverts are preferred because you will deal with people constantly, and an introvert would be driven insane in short order.
Demand for this job is effectively unlimited, which is why I listed it first.
System Administrator
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Introverted Intuitive personality type
A system administrator must manage a large computer, or perhaps many of them. He or she must manage the needs of various users, prevent crashes, prevent illegitimate access to the system, and maintain backups, both in case of destruction of the computer and in case of "oops, I accidentally erased a critical file."
Hair Stylist
Requirements: High Wisdom, High Finger Dexterity, Sensing personality type
Hair stylists cut hair into interesting styles, obviously. Also, dying, shaving, and other things people want done to their hair. They are an artist...of hair.
Chemist
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Moderate Finger Dexterity, Sensing personality type, probably preferably introverted.
A chemist mixes chemicals together and notes how they react. Chemists are usually employed to discover new drugs, but are also necessary in many other industries that want new and better materials. Chemists must be observant, meticulous, and must avoid spilling things on themselves. They should also run quickly, in case they dospill things on themselves.
CEO
Requirements: High Charisma, High Intelligence, Extroverted personality type
CEO stands for Central Executive Officer. They run companies. Their job is to make decisions, and justify them. If these decisions are good, the company prospers, but if the decision is made poorly, they company is in serious trouble. CEOs must also justify their decisions before shareholders and the media. There is a big demand for CEOs, especially because those known to make good decisions are in very short supply. (Despite the enormous salary, few people genuinely qualify. Too bad for me, because I would sure love to be paid $29 million per year.)
Plumber
Requirements: High Wisdom, High Finger Dexterity, willingness to be very very dirty
Plumbers have to build piping systems and fix them when they go wrong. Since pipes can have either clean water or, ehm, used water, the plumber can easily be very dirty indeed when fixing the used water pipes. Which they must have to personally clean.
Bouncer
Requirements: High Strength, Moderate Constitution, Moderate Willpower (is that Wisdom or something else?)
Bouncers eject unruly people from bars, clubs, and similar establishments. They must physically overpower these people, who are often drunk, insane, or infinitely furious. The ejected people have been known to try bargaining, weapons, blows to the groin, pleading, and where applicable, sexual favors. A bouncer must be able to overcome any of these, as anyone ordered ejected is probably up to no good.
Physicist
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Intuitive personality type, (and possibly introvert)
Physicists try to find reality's rules, and describe them with math. Demand for this job is very low now, particularly because the atomic bomb has already been discovered.
Athletes (in general)
Requirements: High Strength, High Constitution, High Body Dexterity, High Finger Dexterity
Many young children aspire to be athletes when they grow up, but only the most powerful can really succeed at it. The requirements are rather high, depending on the sport, there is a lot of competition for the position, and success cannot ever really be guaranteed, since many people are aspiring to be #1 at any cost.
Teacher
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, High Constitution, Moderate Charisma
Teachers teach people new skills. You need to understand the information, figure out how to explain it, and do the explanation. At the lower grades, you must also prevent the students from distracting each other, and develop immunity as you will be repeatedly sneezed on.
Also, the pay is rather terrible, at least in America.
Medical Practitioner
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Intuitive personality type, High Constitution
People come to you sick, and you figure out the problem and devise a solution. You'll need to be smart enough to pass medical school (which is very hard and takes about 7 years for most people), you'll need to be observant, and you'll need to avoid being personally infected.
Poet
Requirements: Moderate Intelligence, Moderate Wisdom, Moderate Finger Dexterity, Verbosity
If a rose had another name
would it smell as sweet?
For a person of many words
this job just can't be beat
Though you'll not make much bread
t'would be good for your head
to express thine own words on a sheet.
Of, you know, paper.
Surgeon
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, High Finger Dexterity
Surgeons specialize in healing people by, counter intuitively, cutting them open and moving their parts around. Surgeons need to excise harmful tissues, such as cancer, repair internal damage via sewing, implant devices to improve quality of life, (pacemakers, cochlear implants, and so on), and ultimately sew up their patient so that they can heal.
Surgeons can be more antisocial than other doctors, as they need not ever interact with their patient when the patient is conscious.
Jeweler
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, High Wisdom
People love gold and silver and platinum and various gems, but what they love even more are those things in a form they can wear on their body. Of course, jewelry doesn't exist until shaped out of its component materials, so this is where you step in.
Psychologist
Requirements: High Intelligence, Patience, Lack of irritation at constant dissembling, Feeling personality type
You can tell them about those scary dreams you've been having, you can tell them about your mother, you can tell them about your fears and anxieties, and they'll listen. Psychologists will listen to what they are told, and will look into the condition of your mind. If you'll listen, they'll suggest things you can do to improve your life.
Of course, many people will endlessly unload and ignore even the most blatantly obvious suggestions, and some people problems are caused not by a problematic life, but by problems with their brain. If the patient refuses to listen, well, that's hardly the psychologist's problem.
If the problem is in their brain, that's where the big-brother of psychologists comes in, the psychiatrist. A psychiatrist is a psychologist with additional medical training, so as to be able to prescribe drugs. The pills will make the voices go away, we hope. If not, there are other pills and therapies.
In a big fit of irony, the founder of psychology was mind-bogglingly insane.
Electrician
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, Moderate Body Dexterity, Moderate-High Intelligence, Moderate Wisdom
Electricians create and repair electrical power systems. They need to place wires, remove damaged ones, ensure the smooth flow of electricity, and not get electrocuted.
Engineer
Requirements: High Intelligence, Moderate Strength, Intuitive personality type
Engineers create machines and structures to solve problems. The machine needs to work, and work well, so an engineer needs to understand physics, chemistry, and a bit of biology.
Politician
Requirements: High Charisma, Extroverted Personality Type, Other things that we're not sure of
Politicians run for government offices. Most of them have big ideas of things they should be doing.
Mechanic
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, Moderate Strength
Mechanics fix broken machines. Most often cars.
Military (lower ranks)
Requirements: High Strength, High Body Dexterity, High Constitution, Willingness to follow orders
Be it the Army, the Navy, the Air Force, or some other branch of the armed services, the most common military job is Infantry, which involves running around someplace while being shot at, and shooting back, all to serve your respective country's national interests.
Soldiers need high strength, so they can hurl bayonets into oncoming enemies, High Body dexterity to dodge projectiles, and high constitution so that they don't immediately die from wounds, disease, and other horrors of the battlefield.
There are other military jobs, but you'd better do them exceedingly well if you hope to stay out of infantry. Because every armed force needs lots of that, but few people want to do it.
Military (higher ranks)
Requirements: High Intelligence, High Wisdom, High Charisma, Having been a lower-ranked officer and being promoted a lot
In the higher ranks of the armed services, you no longer do the fighting yourself, but now have to manage the fighting efforts of other people so that your nation wins. You'll need to be smart, observant, and justify your every decision to both your boss and quite possibly the media. Many wars can also bog down into a quagmire politically, which quickly becomes a no-win situation for you, you poor bastard.
Speaking of the media, you'll need to convince them that your nation is awesome and you are totally winning the war, which will end sometime next month in total victory. Even if any or all this is obviously untrue.
Electronic Engineer
Requirements: High Finger Dexterity, High Intelligence, High Wisdom, Sensing Personality Type
Electronic engineer creates things that use electricity to accomplish a task. They need to be able to place components accurately and without damaging them, to know enough about the components and how they work to make their boards accomplish tasks, and to debug problems that arise.
Of course there are more jobs, but I'll cover them in a later entry, as this one is already excessively long.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Simulation Systems, Tests, and Your Employment (Part 1)
Unemployment is a majorly complained-about problem. Workers dislike the inherent poverty, and companies dislike having to search for, hire, and continue to motivate workers. So let's make it easier to get a job, which should benefit everybody. More people might quit, but they'll quit in favor of a job they prefer.
Various human traits are involved with successful employment. There are a number of models I could draw from, but I'm going to draw from Dungeon's and Dragons, which put together a simplistic model to enable people to pretend to be people very different from themselves. (If forced to play their own self, D&D groups would be radically unbalanced.) It produces six scales of traits, three physical, and three mental, which are randomly generated at the start of play. (You roll three dice to get the numbers. Everyone WANTS high numbers, but the dice effectively take it out of human control.) Over simplistic, perhaps, but if I make this system too complex, it'll collapse under its own weight.
Personality also makes a difference. A salesman and a computer programmer will need wildly different personalities to succeed in their respective fields. If you forced one to take the other's job, they would be miserable. Again, I have an oversimplified model of the Myers-Brigg's tests that boil personality down to four key traits. Introversion vs. Extroversion, Intuition vs. Sensing, Thoughts vs. Feelings, and Perception vs. Judgment.
I'll talk about D&D for a while, if you're familiar with the game, feel free to skip the next few paragraphs or so. I'll also talk about good ways to improve yourself in that field, so it may be good reading anyway.
The D&D traits are strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma. The three-dice system generates numbers between 3 and 18, so 3 was arbitrarily decided to be the lowest-end of this trait found in humankind, and 18 the highest. A person with 3 strength breaks their arm while toweling off after a bath, while a person with 18 strength weight-lifts for fun and can easily ram through doors and rip handcuffs off their wrists.
Strength is, of course, having big muscles and a great ability to exert physical force. The best way to improve yourself, if you think you're deficient here, is to lift weights. Also, avoid watching television, as sitting still makes your body reabsorb the muscle.
Dexterity in D&D involves both the ability to move out of the way of obstacles, reflexes and so on, and also the ability to do fine work with your fingers. I'd split this for my model into body-dexterity (do gymnastics, dance), and finger dexterity (put this tiny gem into this ring and close the tiny wire around it). This is again improved by practice, so dancing and gymnastics will, if done daily, improve your body dexterity, and doing small-scale work like knitting or making miniatures is a great idea for finger dexterity.
Constitution is a general healthiness. A person with great constitution can both fight off disease and keep exerting themselves for hours. Constitution isn't technically a requirement for any job, but companies would prefer to hire workers with great constitution, as they will have fewer sick days, and put less strain on the health insurance. To improve yours, get regular aerobic exercise, eat a varied diet, but not too much or too little, and be sure to sleep consistently, enough, and at the same time every night. (Human bodies are odd about sleep!)
Intelligence is a general catchall of the ability to reason, learn, and remember. It is controversial, because it is ill defined and a major part of human identity. (D&D asserts that all animals have an INT score of 1 or 2, much much lower than any human. This seems...dubious.) Reading is great for this trait, if you think about what you've read. Education is also great exercise for it. This actually matters less than most people think it does.
Wisdom is an ill-defined trait that enables you to notice things. A person with high wisdom is observant, contemplative, and understanding. A person with poor wisdom is absent-minded, distracted, and impulsive. A high wisdom score is essential for any knowledge work, or unpredictable field. Improve yours with quiet reflection, meditative hobbies, and perhaps a trip to a museum. Avoid jangly, distracting mediums such as television.
Charisma is the ability to influence people using charm and force of personality. As a word, it derives from the Greek for "favor,' as they assumed that charismatic people were blessed by the gods. Anyone who wishes to have a public-facing job will need this. There are a lot of disagreements as to if you can influence your own or not. The closest one I can think of to a reliable improvement in charisma is acting classes. It also helps to be sociable, hygienic, and witty.
Okay, the D&D nerd-out is over. You may resume reading.
Now the Myers-Briggs. These two psychologists felt that all people had all eight of these traits, but balanced differently, with one more profoundly showing through, and one only meekly and privately. The one that is shown vs. the one that isn't reveals traits in personality. Let's go over the four dichotomies.
The first is introversion vs. extroversion. An introvert is more concerned with his or her own internal self and ideas, is worn out by social contact (whether they seek it or not), and tends to have a few close friends. An extrovert, in contrast, is more interested in other people, feels built up and excited by other people, and feels "faded away" when alone. They have many friends, most of them more casually than the introvert.
The second is Intuition vs. Sensing. The Intuitive types seek abstraction and big systematic understanding, and the Sensing types prefer the concrete, direct, and small details.
The third is Thinking vs. Feeling. Thinkers put weight into logic, Feelers demand emotional positions. A Feeler will find a Thinker cold and inhuman, a Thinker will find a Feeler irrational and silly. (But both have important roles to play in a civilization.)
The last is Perception vs. Judgment. Perceivers want to keep the options open until they have enough evidence to make a decision, whereas Judgers want to have a plan ahead of time.
Myers and Briggs both assert that only the person themselves has true knowledge about where they would fall, but a number of tests on the internet can offer their advice.
Next up, how to use these traits to find a job you'll be happy with.
Various human traits are involved with successful employment. There are a number of models I could draw from, but I'm going to draw from Dungeon's and Dragons, which put together a simplistic model to enable people to pretend to be people very different from themselves. (If forced to play their own self, D&D groups would be radically unbalanced.) It produces six scales of traits, three physical, and three mental, which are randomly generated at the start of play. (You roll three dice to get the numbers. Everyone WANTS high numbers, but the dice effectively take it out of human control.) Over simplistic, perhaps, but if I make this system too complex, it'll collapse under its own weight.
Personality also makes a difference. A salesman and a computer programmer will need wildly different personalities to succeed in their respective fields. If you forced one to take the other's job, they would be miserable. Again, I have an oversimplified model of the Myers-Brigg's tests that boil personality down to four key traits. Introversion vs. Extroversion, Intuition vs. Sensing, Thoughts vs. Feelings, and Perception vs. Judgment.
I'll talk about D&D for a while, if you're familiar with the game, feel free to skip the next few paragraphs or so. I'll also talk about good ways to improve yourself in that field, so it may be good reading anyway.
The D&D traits are strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma. The three-dice system generates numbers between 3 and 18, so 3 was arbitrarily decided to be the lowest-end of this trait found in humankind, and 18 the highest. A person with 3 strength breaks their arm while toweling off after a bath, while a person with 18 strength weight-lifts for fun and can easily ram through doors and rip handcuffs off their wrists.
Strength is, of course, having big muscles and a great ability to exert physical force. The best way to improve yourself, if you think you're deficient here, is to lift weights. Also, avoid watching television, as sitting still makes your body reabsorb the muscle.
Dexterity in D&D involves both the ability to move out of the way of obstacles, reflexes and so on, and also the ability to do fine work with your fingers. I'd split this for my model into body-dexterity (do gymnastics, dance), and finger dexterity (put this tiny gem into this ring and close the tiny wire around it). This is again improved by practice, so dancing and gymnastics will, if done daily, improve your body dexterity, and doing small-scale work like knitting or making miniatures is a great idea for finger dexterity.
Constitution is a general healthiness. A person with great constitution can both fight off disease and keep exerting themselves for hours. Constitution isn't technically a requirement for any job, but companies would prefer to hire workers with great constitution, as they will have fewer sick days, and put less strain on the health insurance. To improve yours, get regular aerobic exercise, eat a varied diet, but not too much or too little, and be sure to sleep consistently, enough, and at the same time every night. (Human bodies are odd about sleep!)
Intelligence is a general catchall of the ability to reason, learn, and remember. It is controversial, because it is ill defined and a major part of human identity. (D&D asserts that all animals have an INT score of 1 or 2, much much lower than any human. This seems...dubious.) Reading is great for this trait, if you think about what you've read. Education is also great exercise for it. This actually matters less than most people think it does.
Wisdom is an ill-defined trait that enables you to notice things. A person with high wisdom is observant, contemplative, and understanding. A person with poor wisdom is absent-minded, distracted, and impulsive. A high wisdom score is essential for any knowledge work, or unpredictable field. Improve yours with quiet reflection, meditative hobbies, and perhaps a trip to a museum. Avoid jangly, distracting mediums such as television.
Charisma is the ability to influence people using charm and force of personality. As a word, it derives from the Greek for "favor,' as they assumed that charismatic people were blessed by the gods. Anyone who wishes to have a public-facing job will need this. There are a lot of disagreements as to if you can influence your own or not. The closest one I can think of to a reliable improvement in charisma is acting classes. It also helps to be sociable, hygienic, and witty.
Okay, the D&D nerd-out is over. You may resume reading.
Now the Myers-Briggs. These two psychologists felt that all people had all eight of these traits, but balanced differently, with one more profoundly showing through, and one only meekly and privately. The one that is shown vs. the one that isn't reveals traits in personality. Let's go over the four dichotomies.
The first is introversion vs. extroversion. An introvert is more concerned with his or her own internal self and ideas, is worn out by social contact (whether they seek it or not), and tends to have a few close friends. An extrovert, in contrast, is more interested in other people, feels built up and excited by other people, and feels "faded away" when alone. They have many friends, most of them more casually than the introvert.
The second is Intuition vs. Sensing. The Intuitive types seek abstraction and big systematic understanding, and the Sensing types prefer the concrete, direct, and small details.
The third is Thinking vs. Feeling. Thinkers put weight into logic, Feelers demand emotional positions. A Feeler will find a Thinker cold and inhuman, a Thinker will find a Feeler irrational and silly. (But both have important roles to play in a civilization.)
The last is Perception vs. Judgment. Perceivers want to keep the options open until they have enough evidence to make a decision, whereas Judgers want to have a plan ahead of time.
Myers and Briggs both assert that only the person themselves has true knowledge about where they would fall, but a number of tests on the internet can offer their advice.
Next up, how to use these traits to find a job you'll be happy with.
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